Tonight I had my big a-ha moment. Through all the mistakes I have made in the last two months, all the times I have wondered what the hell I was doing, all the time I wanted to run away and never look back, I knew there was a reason for it all. Tonight it really hit me what that reason was. We had a very uneventful night. Little Man was a good boy and napped without fighting it and gave Mommy a chance to watch a movie. Okay, two movies. After he woke up and I gave him a bottle and changed him, I started bouncing him in his bouncy seat. As I was talking to him, he gave me a huge smile. Now usually, I get one smile a day and that's it. He is a very mysterious child. But tonight, as I got all excited thanking him for the smile, he smiled again. Again I went crazy thanking him and telling him I loved him and he smiled again. My little guy was so happy that Mommy loved him and was just playing attention to him. He was happy that I was just there. I won't lie, I'm a total sap and I cried a little. I picked him up and cuddled him and I too, was happy that I was just there.
Love,
Mom
What was your big a-ha moment? When did you realize that you were doing it right?
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